Thursday 23 June 2011

'Mummy, there's a bit of a mess!'

Words you don't want to hear upon entering your son's room and being confronted by a rather unsavoury smell, before noticing that he has removed his pyjama bottoms.. and his nappy....

Nooooooooooooooo!!

Bless him, looking up at me with his gorgeous eyes and his lovely curly mop of hair with poo smeared all down his little chubby legs and all over his cherubic face, all over his cot, his mattress and his blankets.

Not the best start and unfortunately it went even more downhill from there.

Nevermind, tomorrow is another day <whistles>.  Someone pass me a strong G & T.

NB. This was NOT how Dexter looked this morning

Monday 20 June 2011

Things I have learnt after 5 days at Center Parcs

1.  That I don't look good in a cycle helmet.

2.  That there is no room for fashion at Center Parcs.  Cycling with heels is a tad precarious especially when they get stuck in the pedals.....

3.  That I am very unfit - having to walk up hilly bits with my bike whilst small children whizz past on their little bikes with stabilisers is a 'little bit' embarrassing.

4.  That I should leave the manouvering of the kids onto the zip wire to my husband.  Launching my toddler onto the seat then pushing her (without letting go) results in me falling flat on my face.  Which equals more embarrassment (and hurty bits).

5.  That I am turning into a scaredy cat.  'Nooo you can't go on that slide it looks really dangerous' (said to my husband as he comandeered a 'drop slide' in a soft play area).

6.  That pre-kids I never thought I would ever go to such a place as Center Parcs but actually it was really good and we are going to go again :-)

Saturday 18 June 2011

Keani's 'bad dream'

So we've just returned from a fantastic 5 days at Center Parcs (more about that to come).  We spent the last day at Walby Farm Park (fabulous place!).  Anyhow, the kids were knackered when we came home and quickly went to sleep... until about an hour later when we heard Keani run out of her room crying.  James went up to investigate and apparently the conversation went like this:

K: 'I've had a bad dream daddy' <clinging to James and sobbing her heart out>
J: 'Oh dear sweetheart, what were you dreaming about?'
K: 'Pigs' <more sobbing>
J: 'and why was that a bad dream Keani?' 'why are you so upset?'
K: 'They were sticking their tongues out at me' <sobbing gets louder>
K: 'Naughty pigs!'

Apparently at this point James was shaking with laughter and trying not to let it out.  Poor Keani and her bad dreams.  I hate it when the kids are unhappy, and knowing that they're dreaming about stuff that upsets them is horrible.  But pigs sticking their tongues out?! I really hope that's the worst dream she'll ever have :-)

Saturday 11 June 2011

Swimming cossie trauma!

So today I decided to go shopping for a swimming cossie - well when I say 'shopping', if you count a quick scoot into Debenhams with Keani in the pram being bribed with chocolate buttons to be good, then I suppose I went shopping.

With a Center Parcs break on the horizon and lots of swimming planned I needed to replace my threadbare very boring black (now grey) tummy control swimming costume.

So I went to Debenhams and bought a new black tummy control swimming costume.

Not quite the result I was after. Unfortunately the prettier swmming cossies without the control in them, weren't that forgiving around my mum tum, in fact they made me look pregnant. I still pat my tummy sometimes forgetting that I am not indeed pregnant (nor likely to be) so it's only a matter of time before someone asks me when I'm expecting.

So I tried the tummy control cossie on and it looked passable. But god, do I hate looking at myself in the mirror and seeing my body - especially in a swimming cossie! Horrible. I shouldn't have looked really, should have just bought it and convinced myself I looked hot.

It annoys me irrationally when I see all these new mums in the swimming pool when I take the kids and they are parading around in their bikinis. Bikinis! I ask you! I'm feeling bad enough about my belly without these svelte ladies flaunting their taut stomachs in bikinis (sorry if you are one of these mums, I'm just jealous).

Anyway I think it's only proper and right that I crack open some wine now. I need to get over my swimming cossie trauma....

Thursday 9 June 2011

Dexter throws some shapes!

I've got a little Flip camera that I use to record the occasional video.  This is one I did to help promote Real Nappy Week - makes me smile so much every time I watch it :-) I'd love to get better at producing and editing videos, plus I'd rather like a swanky video camera but for now my little Flip does a pretty decent job.  Enjoy!

Wednesday 8 June 2011

Bye bye big bum!

I've always had a big bum - my mum says it's a 'lovely bum' (rather embarrassingly).  I remember when I was around 11 years old and my friend and I decided to make our own skirts (with braces no less, how eighties!).  Her mum helped us with the measuring etc and said something about my bum being bigger than my friend's.  It has always stuck with me and I have hated my bottom ever since!

After 2 kids it's not just my bum that's huge though, the rest of me is considerably lardier than before and I reckon I could do with losing a couple of dress sizes.  I suspect I'm around the size 12-14 mark and I'm only 5ft 1 so I look quite round, like a weeble.

So following on from Wendy's post I have decided to give the 'slimpod' a go - given that I haven't been to the gym in around 6 weeks, possibly more.  I need a lazy approach to losing weight and the slimpod looks perfect!  It's basically an MP3 that you listen to for around 10 minutes a day developed by experts in Harley Street and marketed by The Thinking Slimmer website.  They have developed different voice recordings catering towards different weight loss aspirations - ie there is one designed for chocoholics, one that helps you to lose 2 dress sizes and even a 'chillpod', apparently the 'ultimate relaxer'. 

The Thinking Slimmer website says that you can expect to see a difference to your eating habits within 21 days.  Sounds too good to be true perhaps but early reports from various sources look good and to be honest for 30 quid I'm willing to give it a punt!

So having listened to it last night I have started today really well and not eaten the usual array of crap I usually do.  Of course this probably isn't anything to do with the Slimpod but it's a good start.  Lets see what happens in a week or so!  I'm excited!

Sunday 5 June 2011

Listography - Top 5 Decisions I'm Glad I Made

Kate Takes 5 has challenged us to list our top 5 decisions we're glad we've made.  These are mine:

1.  I'm glad I took a year out of work to travel.  Aged 25 I decided to jack my job in and go to Australia for a year.  One of the best years of my life.  Yes I did it on a credit card, yes, I came back with a huge amount of debt but I have never regretted it.  Whenever I see Australia on the TV I get so emotional now, it really does hold a very special place in my heart.  We are seriously considering moving there.

2.  Dumping my much older boyfriend (this was prior to the Australia trip).  We were together for 3 years ago, he came with 2 kids and he seriously messed me up for many reasons.  My self esteem was battered, in fact I think in hindsight I became quite depressed.  He was a charmer and I fell for his flashy ways, but he eroded my confidence bit by bit.  The best thing I ever did was dump him.  A great decision!

3.   Changing my mind about dumping the next boyfriend.  When I came back from Australia I met a lovely man but I wasn't sure I was that 'into him'.  As I was dumping him, it occured to me that actually he was a very sweet guy and I was silly to dump him, so I didn't!  7 years or so later we were married and now 10 years on we have 2 kids.  He is by far the best thing to happen to me.

4.  Quitting smoking.  I quit smoking when I was 30 (not long after meeting husband above).  James has always been pretty clean living and sensible, whereas I have had quite a rebellious streak and was a bit wild in certain ways up to the time of meeting him.  I guess it was probably unhappiness and self esteem issues that led to me smoking (and other stuff.. ahem!).  He made me happy and I quit doing a lot of bad stuff. 

5.  Having kids.  I wanted kids way before James so had to wait until he was ready.  Keani came along and was such a sweet and mild mannered baby, an 'easy' baby.  We absolutely adored those first months with her and were so happy.  So we decided to have another baby and Dexter came along.  2 fantastic kids, such hard work now they're both toddlers, but my god I love them with all my heart and can't imagine life without them.  I try and be a good mother but feel like I fail miserably a lot of the time but they are happy children and I love them unconditionally.  I hope in time I can become a better parent.  I'm still learning...

I'm a poet and I don't know it!

I was lucky enough to win a trip to Venice courtesy of Naked Wines and have just returned from a most fantastic break. 

For the competition I had to write a Valentines poem which was fortunate as I had just written one for my husband's Valentines card so I submitted that - thinking firstly that the judge was Italian and wouldn't really 'get' it and secondly that there was no way that I could win!

I received a telephone call late on a Friday afternoon and to say I was ecstatic was an understatement.  I was so chuffed to have won such a creative competition and Venice is a city I have always wanted to visit so it was the most amazing news.

We stayed in a beautiful hotel, met up with winemaker Alessandro and drank lots of wine, were treated to lunch with Alessandro, his sister and some of his staff (that was an experience!) and generally had a fab time.  They also treated us to dinner one night (and more wine) and gave us 200 euros to spend. 

Next week we are off to Center Parcs to stay in a 3 bedroomed lodge for 4 nights - again this was a poetry competition and out of 400 or so poems, mine won!  We cannot wait for Center Parcs, in fact I think we are more excited than the kids.

Comping is a fantastic hobby.  I used to think it was a bit 'sad' haha! but now I think it's pretty cool, and it makes every day exciting waiting for that winning email, phone call or long white envelope.  Roll on tomorrow!

Saturday 4 June 2011

Dexter's birthday

So little Dex was 2 yesterday, bless him.  He celebrated it by going to nursery and giving me a bit of peace ;-)  In all seriousness he did go to nursery but only because we couldn't swap his day - anyway he didn't really properly know it was his birthday!  We celebrated his birthday today with a lovely party at a local wildlife centre.  I made his cake and everything <proud mum>.  It was the first birthday cake I'd ever made and I reckon I did pretty well!  I don't do well at much, but maybe there's a smidgen of talent there?  What do you think?

Wednesday 1 June 2011

Little Dex is a winner, yey!

This evening I found out Dexter had come second with his pic in the Pushchair Trader competition on Facebook - out of over 400 entries, go Dex!  To be fair it was probably my superior photography skills that won the competition not the super cuteness of our Dexter ;-) We have won a £140 pram, so very chuffed with that.

On an altogether different note, James is at band practice tonight and I have managed to eat nearly a whole box of mint Matchmakers.  Go me! (not).  Bleurrrgh.  Feel a bit sick now.

Why the blog? What's with the name?

So I've decided to set up a little blog, primarily to document my competition efforts and successes and to spur me on when I can't be bothered to enter any (this happens frequently).  I guess it might be also be interspersed with little snippets of life, who knows?

I chose the name as it seemed very apt (I have no discernible talent - funny that!).  Some would say being able to 'type really fast' is a talent, or being able to 'swim a length underwater' is a talent - I would have to disagree.  I would love to have a proper talent - like singing (ha, yeah I wish!) or writing (I'm working on it) or even being able to bend my leg around my ear - something really impressive like that would be good.  But no.  I am however pretty good at moving baked beans with chopsticks, but more about that later.....